Provide information about the diagnosis or medical condition | - Provides knowledge of what the disability or medical diagnosis is, and what to expect
- Helps to reassure the sibling and to answer the questions they get from others
| - Give clear, understandable information and explanations
- Make sure they understand that no one is to blame for their sibling’s disability
- Figure out when and how to explain a diagnosis
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Encourage open family discussions about siblings’ feelings and concerns | - Allows siblings to talk about both positive and negative feelings, in a safe space
- Provides a chance to talk about ways to handle stressful events such as: stigma, discrimination and bullying
| - Recognize their feelings and concerns
- Expect and acknowledge that they may have different emotions related to their sibling’s disability, and that it’s okay
- Try to share your time equally between your children
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Set reasonable expectations for all of your children in the family | - Allows each sibling to learn and get involved when they are ready
- Helps your child to reflect on similarities and differences to their sibling with a disability
- Prevents them from feeling like they have to do/achieve more for their sibling with a disability
- Helps teach independence in the child with a disability so that each child can be an individual
| - Ask each child what they think you can expect from them – include them in the process
- Understand that each child has different strengths and needs
- Give clear expectations to ALL of your children (including the child with the disability) and explain that expectations can change
- Recognize the accomplishments of each child
- Keep the door open to conversation
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Encourage siblings to be children, and let them know they can find a balance between being a kid and a caregiver too | - Siblings are children too and could use time to play and live their own lives
- Helps them feel that they are not the only one responsible, especially in the future
- Allows them to see the importance and value of taking time for themselves
- Helps them to develop their own identity and interests
| - Make sure there is dedicated time that is just for the sibling (whether it is time with their friends or time with you)
- Discuss different roles in the family and relieve any pressure they might feel about having to be an ‘adult’ all the time
- As a family, you can all talk about what their sibling’s life can look like in the future.
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You can also find appropriate ways to have siblings take part in medical appointments | - Your child can provide valuable ideas
- They are an important member of the sibling with a disability’s care team
- Siblings will be in the lives of the sibling with a disability longer than anyone else
| - Share up-to-date information in a simple way with your child so that they can be involved in family decisions
- Your child can observe their sibling with a disability in therapy or in a learning setting
- Prepare your child for changes in home life before they happen
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Your sibling children might want to talk to another sibling. If they do, you can help them connect. | - Your child will share many of the same concerns as parents, but also have their own concerns or worries as siblings
- The chance to discuss feelings with other siblings is important – it might be hard to talk to their family about it right away
- Many siblings often grow up without resources to support them
- Siblings need the same kind of peer support that parents get from parent support groups
- Siblings need to understand that it is okay to take care of themselves as well
| - Ask them if they want to meet other siblings of people with disabilities and let them decide if this is something that they want
- If the child does not want to join a group yet, keep the door open to discuss it when they’re ready
- Provide opportunities for your sibling child to receive support – going to sibling workshops or a Young Carers Program if they wish
- Let teachers know what is happening so that they can also provide appropriate supports to your children
- Model self-care as a parent
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